Cattāri Brahmavihārā

Posted by: Michael | 05/03/2013

Happy Uposatha – Dana Parami

I have been doing a lot of thinking and some reading of late on the bodhisatta ideal and other practices which I have come to think of as the natural growth of the brahma-viharas. In particular, I have been re-reading certain Mahayana/Vajrayana texta such as the Wheel of Sharp Weapons and the Bodhicaryavatara and the lojong texts of various Tibetan lineages and have been inspired by them even if I can’t swallow them whole. Regardless of the unpalatable doctrinal differences in terms of Tantric and Mahayana Abhidharma I still feel that there is much to be learned from these texts and the saintly men and women who have and continue to this day to practice according to these teachings.

Anyhow, my reading has brought me back to where I began and I have once again encountered the Ven. Ledi Sayadaw’s Manual of the Excellent Man but am noe approaching it with renewed vigor. That being so, it seems timely and utterly relevant to take today to ponder on the true meaning of dana parami. Whether I realize it or not my recent commitment to be of service to all I meet is nothing less than the practice of dana and I intend to spend this week reflecting on the theme.

May the goodness of my practice be shared with all being! May I ever be of service and give freely of whatever I have!

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Posted in Aditthana, Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dana, Dhamma, Theravada, Uposatha | Tags: bodhicaryavatara, Bodhisatta, dana, parami, paramita, wheel of sharp weapons

Posted by: Michael | 05/02/2013

A Gift to Overcome Animosity

At work, we share the floor with a few other companies and, as such, we share the bathroom as well. Over the years we’ve never really had any issues with anyone on the floor except for with one company in particular. They have, over time, taken to locking the communal cabinets with a combination lock (to which we weren’t given the key), have accused us of stealing toilet paper, air freshener and have complained that my employees take too long in the bathroom. They have also posted notices asking that we not close all of the doors (there is an outer sink) when in the bathroom and have pinned up other similarly silly requests in the bathroom as well. And, for whatever reason, it only seems to be getting worse.

Yesterday, one of my employees returned from the bathroom to tell me he had been accosted by one of the owners of said business asking why he had taken ten minutes in the bathroom. I don’t think I have ever taken that long but far be it from me to legislate another man’s bowel movements. Obviously he was upset and I, too, found myself inwardly fuming. I suppose the last straw for me was when I was leaving and I saw the other owner of the company waiting for the bathroom while I waited for the elevator. I said hello and received a less than enthusiastic response.

As I rode the elevator down and walked to the train I kept going over just how angry I was and thinking about how much suffering right there in the moment animosity brings. I inwardly recite “May I be free from aversion, may they be free from the suffering that causes them to act unskilfully” and although it helped I still felt the burn of ill-will. Skip to this morning and an idea sprung to mind in the midst of meditation: I would buy them a gift. The moment I thought of it the entire world changed. It was literally as though a weight was removed from my heart because in some strange way a material gift can express good-will in a way that language cannot. So, I bought them a gift set of soaps and will leave it at their door on Monday. How it is received doesn’t matter–what does is that with the soap I am also giving away my animosity.

May all beings have happiness and the causes of happiness!

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Posted in Buddhism, Daily Practice, Forgiveness, Metta, Practice at Work, Theravada | Tags: Bathroom, Bizarre, Buddha, compassion, Home and Garden, Humor, Recreation, Religion and Spirituality, Shopping, Theravada, Toilet, Toilet paper

Posted by: Michael | 05/01/2013

Metta and Vulnerability

Today has been a struggle to remember my intention to radiate metta and to generate the enthusiasm required to do so in part because it has been a pretty busy week so far (only 2 days in) and for other kammic reasons of which I am unaware. Nonetheless, when I have remembered to smile it has been much easier so I am grateful for the practice. There is, however, one thing I noticed yesterday and which I have encountered before when practicing metta with the Dhammasukha method: I feel at times what can best be described as a fear or vulnerability when smiling at people.

Yes, it certainly sounds strange to me when I put it into words, but there are times when I am smiling and radiating metta that feel almost dangerous, as if I’m inviting something to happen. I can’t tell if this is simply a paranoid fear on my part or if I am actually opening myself up to potential problems although I have never yet had anything happen. To be clear: I don’t walk around the streets of New York maniacally smiling at strangers. It’s rather that I smile and try to cultivate an openness of heart which leaves me feeling raw and vulnerable.

Having said all of that I don’t intend to give up on this practice as fear has usually been a pretty good indicator that work needs to be done in a certain area. I would encourage anyone who reads this to share their feelings and experiences of metta in daily life because I’m interested to know if anyone else has noticed anything similar.

Rakkhantu sabba devata!

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Posted in Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dhamma, Metta, Theravada | Tags: daily practice, love, metta, vulnerablilty

Posted by: Michael | 04/30/2013

Smile

I noticed something yesterday during my commute that really struck home and reminded me that the practice is not a selfish turning away but can really be motivated by our concern for all beings. So, what did I notice? In short, wave after wave of forlorn, somber and long faces seemed to breaqk around me in the sea of people we call NYC. Perhaps it was because it was a Monday but even today the trains seem filled to capacity with dukkha. It goes without saying that I could simply be misinterpreting what I’m seeing or even projecting but that really doesn’t change a thing: what matters is what I perceive and how I put that perception to work.

Immediately upon realizing that my fellow New Yorkers all seemed to be lost in nightmarish reveries of their own I also became aware of just how this was impacting upon my own mood and outlook. It is as if this fear, fatigue and animosity were gaining in momentum as it bounced off each person and picked up extra energy. I think at that point I must have seen one person smile and the whole thing just dissolved in front of me. I knew then that not only did I not have to buy into the despair and angst but that I could actually mae a difference with something as seemingly insignificant as a smile. And I can only imagine just how much more powerful is a smile when it’s backed up by universal well-wishing.

May we all give the gift of our smiles to those we meet today and embrace them in our well-wishing hearts!

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Posted in Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dana, Dhamma, Metta, Theravada | Tags: loving-kindness, metta, mondays, smile, well-wishing

Posted by: Michael | 04/29/2013

Subway Dana

This morning, as my son and I made our to Brooklyn on the train, we encountered the seemingly ubiquitous homeless person begging for a handout. Although I am committed to teaching my son about the importance of generosity I was not initially impressed by the man’s demeanor nor his story. I think the most important thing about this morning’s episode was that it afforded me the opportunity to see into the machinations of a closed heart. I mean, what really is the value of a dollar in comparisn with the merit made in giving? Nonetheless I find myself meeting with a hard heart when I have the chance to give more often than I would like to admit.

Some of the reasons for this attitude are old and familiar: don’t give to people who are probably drug addicts; don’t give to people who are too lazy to work or avail themselves of publicf services. In addition to these, the more pernicious ones seem to be based on my own poor understanding of the Dhamma. For example, because I am concerned with maximizing the benefit and merit obtained by my finite reesources, I sometimes shirk at the opportunity to give to those who are less than worthy. In other words, why give to a lout or drunkard when there are plenty of bhikkhus in need? There is a certain compelling logic to this and I think, if I understand the Buddhadhamma correctly, that more merit and good results from giving to a pure recipient but in terms of my own practice understanding the metaphysics of dana in this way is not useful and doesn’t help to cultivate dana parami at all.

So, in the end, despite my misgivings I gave the man a dollar. I relied on the reflection that I would not want to make my living in such a way even if it meant I would be a millionaire so I was able to generate some compassion and give from it. Still, it was difficult and it was certainly one of the lower forms of giving. I hope to come to an ever better understanding of dana as my practice grows and slowly melt my heart.

May we all understand the power of dana and cultivate it until it is perfected in our hearts!

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Posted in Aditthana, Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dana, Dhamma, Karuna, Theravada | Tags: compassion, dana, generosity, giving, hard-hearted, parami

Posted by: Michael | 04/28/2013

The Strength to Learn

This morning was rough. We had an apartment full of children and my sister-in-law and mother-in-law sleep over and there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. Suffice it to say that the 15 minutes I was able to sneak in amidst the shrill cries of frustation and delight of 4 little children was superficial at best but I was grateful for it nonetheless.

I suppose the most disturbing thing about this morning was the fact that I was carried away by my irritation on more than one occasion, forgetting completely my resolve to be of service to all and foregoing anyh opportunity to learn from the situation. And, I think that may be the worst part of it: I can always repent of my akusala kamma (not that I can avoid its coming to fruition) but when I give up and give into the kilesas I learn nothing about them. And, knowing nothing about why and when I give in to the kilesas and how they work I am destined to repeat the same akusala kamma time and again. That’s the fear at least.

May we all find the strength to learn from the kilesas and to finally put and end to them.

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Posted in Aditthana, Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dhamma, Forgiveness, Formal Meditation, Theravada | Tags: aditthana, akusala, forgiveness, kamma, karuna, kilesas, repentance

Posted by: Michael | 04/27/2013

Radiating Metta – Alternate Transalations

As some of you may know, I have been using a set of traditional metta phrases which I borrowed from Ven. Thanissaro. I have had some success with the technique of reciting the phrases either singly or in rondo form but this is not to say I have not had difficulty with the translations of some of the phrases. Inspired to take another look at the prevalent, English translations I was surprised to learn that I have probably been doing it all wrong. The most common alternative to the Wat Metta and Amaravati versions that I have found online is as follows:

Aham sukhito homi
Niddukkho homi
Avero homi
Aroko homi
Abyapajjho homi
Anigho homi
Sukhi attanam pariharami
Sabbe Satta
Sukita hontu
Niddukkha hontu
Avera hontu
Aroka hontu
Abyapajjha hontu
Anigha hontu
Sukhi attanam pariharantu

May I be happy,
may I be from suffering,
may I be free from enmity,
may I be free from illness,
may I be free from malice,
may I be free from suffering of body and mind,
may I protect my own well-being.
Whatever beings there are,
may they be happy,
may they be free from suffering,
may they be free from enmity,
may they be free from illness,
may they be free from malice,
may they be free from suffering of body and mind,
may they protect their own well-being.

You will note that abyapajjho homi is translated as “may I be free from malice” which seems to me the more sensible translation than what I had been using before and the addition of aroko homi which was not present in the version I have been using. For whatever reason, this adaptation resonates with me so I will switch to it for the time being until, of course, my mind changes again.

May all beings live in safety and security!

metta world therapy, temper (brainfriedblog.wordpress.com)
Celebrate World Day of Metta! (mettarefuge.wordpress.com)
Metta meditation: really beautiful animated video and directions for practice (beyondmeds.com)

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Posted in Abyapajjo homi, Anigho homi, Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dhamma, Formal Meditation, Karuna, Metta, Mudita, Theravada | Tags: Aham, anigha, brahmavihara, metta, Pali, suffering, Thanissaro Bhikkhu, Translation

Posted by: Michael | 04/26/2013

De medicationem

I woke up from the uposatha in a horrible way. To describe how I have been feeling as simply “low-energy” would be an understatement. As a result I was slow in getting going and missed my window of opportunity to do my full 45 minute sit as my 2 year-old came and starting begging me for water at the 15-minute mark. From then until now it has been a struggle to get through the day’s tasks and even the thought of sitting in meditation was painful. Frankly, I’ve never felt quite this low before but I knew that I needed to do something so I finally convinced myself to do my 25 minute metta bhavana with little hope that it would work to ease the tension and fatigue. But, to my delight, it did–if only while meditating.

So, despite the low that I’m currently in and the fact that I feel like a cow with its skin flayed off because I seem to be uber-sensitive to everything right now, I can take comfort in the fact that I have developed my practice of metta bhavana and anapansati enough tp the point where it can serve as salve on my wounds. Of course, this won’t always be the case but even during those times when I can’t find solace in meditation I will always have the Dhamma as my refuge.

May the light of the Triple Gem shine on and guide us all to liberation and safety!

A Meditation For Promoting Peace Within Ourselves (blogs.psychcentral.com)
Meditation Challenge: Samatha Bhavana (Calm-Abiding Meditation) (lovelaughbelight.com)

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Posted in Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dhamma, Gratitude, Metta, Theravada, Uposatha | Tags: Buddha, Buddhism, Dhamma, Dharma, health, meditation, metta, Religion and Spirituality, Theravada, Three Jewels

Posted by: Michael | 04/25/2013

Well-wishing through Conflict

We are being faced with an issue wherein some of the parents of the children who have been alleged to be engaged in agressive behavior towards our son are, themselves, becoming combative. I can completely understand their reaction as they may feel their kids are being unjustly accused or that much is being made of “kid stuff.” Nonetheless, it is my duty as a pareent to protect and care for my child so I take a phenomenological approach: regardless of the “objective” facts of the matter my son feels angry, sad and frustrated by the events unfolding at his school so I can’t simply let it go without trying to resolve the situation. It is precisely here where it gets dicey.

My preference in such sittuations would be to withdraw completely from the situation but that obviously is not an option. What has helped to quell the anger and animosity is the reflection uponb the fact that there is no real difference between any of us: I could easily be the parent of a bully and would want my son to be given a chance to reform and be understood. What’s more, when I imagine how a parent might feel when there is a group of parents accusing my child of bullying it becomes immediately clear that karuna is the appropriate response. That said, although I cannot control what arises I know I can continue to wish all involved well and act slowly and deliberately to try to do as little harm as possible in this already tense and fraught situation. I may not have a plan for every eventuality but I can plan to do everything out of love and concern.

Rakkhantu sabba devata!

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Posted in Buddhism, Daily Practice, Dhamma, Forgiveness, Karuna, Metta, Parenting, Theravada | Tags: bullying, children, concern, karuna, metta, parenting

Posted by: Michael | 04/24/2013

Beginning Again

Last night I attended the third of six classes on anapanasati as taught by my teacher and although I have been practicing with him for the better part of eight years I felt and have been feeling as though the things we are learning in terms of technique are completely new. Is it really possible that I never gave his instructions the attention they were due despite spending so much time with him? It reminds of the verse wherein the Lord Buddha describes the person who is like a ladle in a bowl of soup which, despite being inclose contact with it is unable to taste it. I feel that due to my own obstinancy and arrogance I was like unto that spoon for so many years. It is only now when I have been able to strip away some of my conceit and appreciate my teacher more deeply inn his own right that I have even been able to hear anything besides the fault-finding voices in my own head let alone put them into practice.

May we never fall prey to arrogance and conceit and ever remember the true potency of humilty!

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Posted in Buddhism, Dhamma, Forgiveness, Formal Meditation, Gratitude, Theravada | Tags: Anapanasati, arrogance, conceit, fault-finding, Teacher