Posted by: Upāsaka | 10/12/2018

Ahamkara

I’ve been reading a book on Abhidhamma lately and it has both given me a feeling of depth which is sometimes lacking while simultaneously making me feel as though even the illusory, skilful self I am building is nothing but a tower of sea foam. And, of course it is but what I’m feeling and what DOES NOT follow is that it’s a futile exercise.

I think this ties in with a general feeling of malaise and detection resulting from my lack of discipline and other failings. Why though, if I can see so clearly how ephemeral the good me is am I so incapable of seeing the insubstantiality of the worse version? I hope to someday understand this process of ahamkara but until then I’ll try to keep practicing Right Effort.


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Bloomwords

The mud, the lotus and the pale golden blue.

Dirk Pieters

writer, buddhist, yogi / schrijver, boeddhist, yogi

لا إله إلا الله

The Knowledge is Provisions from Allah, May Allah guide us and strength our Iman & Taqwa. Ameen.