Posted by: Upāsaka Subhavi | 10/01/2013

Doubt and the Breath

I have been trying to take up the practice of awareness of the breath in all postures and all times and have had. Some great success. It has definitely served me well in helping to smooth out rough patches of the day and to get some space between the imaginary me and the anxiety that I seem to want so badly to call my own. Yet, what stands out most about the last two days is simply the amount of doubt that comes up and questions my very ability to be successful in this practice.

I had never considered myself to be overly plagued by doubt as I readily accept all of the teachings of the Lord Buddha found in the Pali canon so that may be why I was so blind-sided by the doubt that surrounds my practice. As I walked this morning and sought to keep my attention on the breath voices of doubt continuously arose: am I doing this right? Should I keep trying to feel the breath in my chest? Should I switch to the nose? Oh no, I can’t find the breath anywhere, what to do!? These are the voices that have kept me from practicing natural meditation for years but I have only just seen them for what they are today. And for that I am grateful.


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Teachings of Lord Buddha in the Pali Canon