Posted by: Upāsaka | 07/23/2013

Deserving to Suffer

This morning, crossing 14th St to catch the West Side bus I realized I was questioning my decision to do so. In effect, the bus ride is something I enjoy more than the train because I am actually ablle to see the outside world and avoid being crushed in a sardine-like car. Yet, I often lose about ten minutes of commute time when I take the bus and I often end up feeling that I am simply wasting my time despite the fact that the bus ride seems to help in easing me into the day and side-stepping the frantic rush of the day.

So it was precisely this cost-benefit calculation that ran quickly through my head this AM and I realized that I generally side with the task master in my head that demands an excuse for every little deviation from efficiency and speed.and although I rarely give such issues consideration it is obviouslly unheallthy to continue to live this way. What is ten minutes really worth anyway? If it’s in the service of panic, aversion and anxiety surely it is capable of wreaking havoc on me and those around me. Conversely, if I take those ten minutes to do something that brightens the mind then its impact cannot be over estimated. In short, I never deserve to suffer and to sacrifice peace and gentleness on the altar of efficiency and I need to constantly remind myself of my priorities: kindness and care for all beings.

May all beings be well and happy!

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Teachings of Lord Buddha in the Pali Canon

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