Cattāri Brahmavihārā

We are being faced with an issue wherein some of the parents of the children who have been alleged to be engaged in agressive behavior towards our son are, themselves, becoming combative. I can completely understand their reaction as they may feel their kids are being unjustly accused or that much is being made of “kid stuff.” Nonetheless, it is my duty as a pareent to protect and care for my child so I take a phenomenological approach: regardless of the “objective” facts of the matter my son feels angry, sad and frustrated by the events unfolding at his school so I can’t simply let it go without trying to resolve the situation. It is precisely here where it gets dicey.

My preference in such sittuations would be to withdraw completely from the situation but that obviously is not an option. What has helped to quell the anger and animosity is the reflection uponb the fact that there is no real difference between any of us: I could easily be the parent of a bully and would want my son to be given a chance to reform and be understood. What’s more, when I imagine how a parent might feel when there is a group of parents accusing my child of bullying it becomes immediately clear that karuna is the appropriate response. That said, although I cannot control what arises I know I can continue to wish all involved well and act slowly and deliberately to try to do as little harm as possible in this already tense and fraught situation. I may not have a plan for every eventuality but I can plan to do everything out of love and concern.

Rakkhantu sabba devata!