I’m at a crossroads again: I can clearly see the dukkha in following the way of the world but I do not yet know for myself the fruits of the path. How to make a way forward through the thicket of views and confusion? How to ford the flood of desire? With what shall I dispel the darkness of delusion?
It seems to me that it is only faith in the Buddha and his Dhamma that will see me through. At a time when so many of us, perhaps most of us, are spiritually blind it really does seem like there is no way forward without faith in practice.
So, everyday I practice with buddho and I just keep working on the causes, having faith that, one day, they will bear fruit. And, I suppose, that even now there are effects to be seen but the pale in comparison to the deep, existential ache and emptiness that threatens to swallow up every good aim.
May I take heart in the words of the Lord Buddha. May we all take heart and practice with conviction.
“For a lay person, there are these five rewards of conviction. Which five?
“When the truly good people in the world show compassion, they will first show compassion to people of conviction, and not to people without conviction.
When visiting, they first visit people of conviction, and not people without conviction.
When accepting gifts, they will first accept those from people with conviction, and not from people without conviction.
When teaching the Dhamma, they will first teach those with conviction, and not those without conviction.
A person of conviction, on the break-up of the body, after death, will arise in a good destination, the heavenly world.
For a lay person, these are the five rewards of conviction.”
https://www.dhammatalks.org/suttas/AN/AN5_38.html
Cattāri Brahmavihārā 