Posted by: Upāsaka Subhavi | 03/07/2021

Giving Up My Preferences

I lost my cool last night and told my wife to please shut her mouth as she was yelling at me. I’m ashamed that I both spoke harshly and, even more so, that I failed to live by my own values. Perhaps there is a silver lining though.

The whole argument started because my son and I had to reschedule our boxing lessons and there was a misunderstanding. Rather than simply sacrifice my time when my wife suddenly proposed she wanted to go running at that hour, I stood my ground and gained two fistfuls of resentment and bad kamma.

So, did I gain anything by putting my desires first? Clearly not. As such I’ll be making anew determination:

May I cheerfully sacrifice my plans whenever asked to do so.

May I give up my preferences without making a show of my sacrifice and take the opportunity to cultivate equanimity and suppleness of mind.


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Teachings of Lord Buddha in the Pali Canon