Cattāri Brahmavihārā

I have been getting progressively more upset and resentful of the limitations imposed by quarantine. I’m unable to workout in the way I’d like, to pursue the Kenpo and kickboxing training I had started in earnest and to find the solitude I feel I need. I have been at this long enough, however, to know that what I needed to do at this point was sit with this and v let it sort itself out.

During my meditation it slowly came to me that the element that was lacking and what was causing my suffering was simply the wrong intention. Why was I doing these things in the first place? What good is working out or martial arts if they aren’t being undertaken out of mettā and pañña? Whether these can be done out of these intentions may be another question altogether but I was clearly not even inclining the mind in that direction.