Cattāri Brahmavihārā

So I’ve decided that the only real course of action left to me is to pursue brahmacariya. Even if my marriage want bereft of sexual intimacy I don’t see how it would help me asking the path to indulge in such things and, without it, there’s simply no good exist for it. I have tried and failed many times before but I hope that I can build on past failures.

There’s just no more noble or clean way to live and I can feel the difference when I’m practicing. I’m reminding myself that every attractive woman I see has intestines full of feces and a stomach full of bike and gorge. It may not be enough to eradicate lust but it helps to counter it and change the subject. Wish me luck.