Posted by: Upāsaka | 07/25/2017

Boundaries & Forgiveness

This morning a thought occurred to me: why don't I make an effort to truly let go of the hurts of yesterday, forgive as I would want to be forgives and move on without the burden? It seems such a simple thing but I have neglected to do it so often, choosing instead to impose an artificial limit on what I was willing " to take." This morning I have firmly decided that, having taken, I will not keep but will forgive all and start anew.

And yet, I'm not alone in this world and just because I'm willing to forgive doesn't mean others in my life are. In this respect, I have also decided that I can't allow the opinions of others to hide my actions. When someone has formed a negative opinion of you, it seems like the best you can do is to treat them as you would want to be treated. In other words, do fit then what you would wish someone would do for you, especially when it confess to household and familial responsibilities. After that, one you have satisfied your own conscience, simply refuse to take criticisms or negativity from them just as the Lord Buddha refused the abuse of Akkosa the Brahmin.

I feel that this is one area where I have been deficient and owe a lot to those in my life who have taught me just how empty praise and blame truly are. For so long I have wanted to seen like the good one, the responsible one that I've kept myself hostage to the viees and opinions of others. And, while it is important to listen wisely to the criticisms and suggestions of anyone in your life, it seems to me that trying desperately to please is a recipe for disaster.


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