Things are definitely not going well for the business and it is strange just how attached I have been to the idea that we were a business that does well. If there was any doubt, the events of the past few days have put that to rest. In so many ways I am at a complete loss of what to do but then I step outside and marvel that I’m still here, breathing as always.
As yet we’re still fighting to hold onto the business but time will tell if that is a fight we can win or if we will be undone. I worry in a way that I think must be unique to fathers and husbands in our culture because so much of my identity has been involved with supporting them. And, there is the fact that I am so tired. But, in this life, this is my responsibility, this is my duty and I must do whatever it takes to protect and care for this family I have helped to create.
Cattāri Brahmavihārā 
Tough times are, very thankfully, impermanent and subject to change. If your business fails, perhaps the conditions are ripe for for something else which will not be so bad. 🙂 Please be well, friend.
By: Hickersonia on 01/10/2014
at 4:22 pm
Hello, I follow you regularly and sometimes your contemplation of things helps me with current issues and worries. Now I read your post and I find resamblance with the events in my business just three days ago. I’m a freelancer and just got awfully frustrated because nobody called or emailed me one week. But it was just ignorance that caused me the suffering. I tried to meditate – not so sucsessfuly, my head was poundering with thoughts, but then 5 or 10 minutes after the formal meditation all of a sudden it stroke me – when did this became so important to me? When did work started to matter so much? It was just absurd. Realising the absurdity I felt free. Today everybody called me – I have plenty of job orders, the meditation was quite good. Everything is anicca – It will pass… Keep writing, I read you a lot!
Boryana
By: gorskovreme on 01/10/2014
at 10:06 pm
Mike,
Just how bad are things going? Do you need help? There is not much I can do, but I can help out somehow.
love, Mu
By: spikee21 on 01/11/2014
at 1:34 am