Cattāri Brahmavihārā

Continuity. This is probably one of the weakest points of my practice and is the reason that I keep this blog at all. I believe it was Thanissaro Bhikkhu who said something to the effect that if we develop one way of behaving and thinking while practicing that is completely divorced and anti-thetical to the way we are in our “normal” lives we are setting ourselves up for problems-I believe he even uses the term “schizoid” although I’m sure he doesn’t mean this in any clinical sense.  

Nonetheless, the dissonance I feel between my sitting or reflection periods and the furnace of daily life is disconcerting and constantly begs for my attention. I suppose what I am trying to figure out is whether I am more disturbed by simply experiencing anger, disappointement or dread or by the unskillful ways that I act, think or speak from them. To be honest I think it is still a little of both. I think the best I can do for now would be to make amends as quickly as possible if and when I speak or act poorly and to turn to the breath to give myself some space and allow things to settle and clarify.

This is great as triage for the mind but the knotty question of how to act well in the midst of the tempest remains. I’m beginning to think that-like it or not-practicing the Dhamma requires stepping away and not delighting over much in the company of others. This is doubly important when it comes to the office and I intend to experiment with this today. Bhavatu sabba mangalam!