Weekends seem to be more challenging than any other type when it comes to maintaining the practice. I have struggled with this reality for years but lately it seems to be getting even more difficult. Primarily I think the issue is the lack of the to oneself which is why I am taking this free moment in between one thing and the next to post.
So, how does a practitioner affront this issue? Where to find time without being a “bad” dad or husband?
120. Some foolish people here, on being told by me: “Give this up,” say: “But what is this small and insignificant matter? This recluse lays too much stress on small things.” And so they do not give up that thing and they cause dissatisfaction to be nursed against me and those who do desire the training. This becomes for them a strong, solid and stout bond, a bond not easily worn away, like a thick block of wood.
Majjhima Nikaya I.449
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In so many ways I have so much to be grateful for so I think it is wise to pause and reflect on that fact before continuing. I have never been without food, shelter, clothing or medicine. I have rarely been without a myriad conveniences and luxuries. And I know no one personally who has. So what is the problem? Why are so many of us so terribly unhappy?
Perhaps I overstate the car and it may be that most people are happy with the current state of affairs but I, for one, find this life of material excess to be forever unsatisfactory. Am I ungrateful? Perhaps but I believe it also points to the fact that my priorities are all wrong. As a being wanting happiness I often confuse pleasure and comfort with true and lasting freedom from suffering. Doing so in this lifetime has certainly made me weaker and more prone to take selfish and shortsighted actions. How much more so is this the case when we consider that we have been acting in this mean and unenlightened way for countless eons?
May I learn to see discomfort as the knife sees the stone or the impure ore the flames of the furnace. May I embrace discomfort with wisdom and compassion so that I may train myself to put an end of suffering.
Posted in Buddha, Buddhism, Dhamma, Dukkha, Theravada | Tags: comfort, discomfort, pleasure, shortsighted
I have said it before but it bears repeating that my viewpoint and work place habits need to come more in line with the Dhamma.
This weekend we, my business partner and I, went to take a look at a company were interested in purchasing. We have had dealing with them in the past and have even orchard a few of their products in the past in order to use them to make our own derivatives. Suffice it to say that there was one transaction which did not go as planned and there were issues which led to me being called out by one of the parties with whom we are now negotiating. Although I won’t get into the details this experience was both internally uncomfortable and a real wake up call.
Why did I believe it was acceptable to treat other people, even if they are the “competition,” in a way I would never consider reading anyone else? How could I so easily forget the Dhamma in the pursuit of gain? As painful as the experience of meeting peopl you have taken advantage of it is good medicine to have apologized face to face.
May I always put the Dhamma before all else and never forget my precepts and practice.
Posted in Buddha, Buddhism, Dhamma, Practice at Work, Theravada | Tags: apology, Business, negotiations
116. Then Venerable Sariputta said: “There are these five ways of putting away malice that arises. What five?
“Take the case of a person whose ways are impure in deed but not in word. Suppose a monk who wears robes made from rags were to see a rag on the road, he would hold it with his left foot and spread it out with his right foot and try to make the best use of it and then go on his way. In the same way, one whose ways are impure in deed but not in word, his deed ought to be disregarded. Think instead about his ways that are pure.
“And concerning one whose words are impure but who is pure in deed, how should malice be put away? Suppose a man, tortured by heat, by heat overspent, wearied, craving and thirsty were to come upon a pond overgrown with mossy slime and water plants. He would plunge into the pond, scatter the water plants this way and that, cup his hands, drink and then go his way refreshed. In the same way, one whose words are impure but who is pure in deed, his words ought to be disregarded. Think instead about his ways that are pure.
“And what of one who is impure in both words and deed, but who can attain mental clarity and calm from time to time? Suppose a man, tortured by heat, by heat overspent, wearied, craving and thirsty, were to come upon a puddle in a cow’s footprint. He might think to himself: ‘Here is a puddle in a cow’s footprint, but if I drink using my hands or a cup I will stir and churn up the mud and make it unfit to drink. What if I were to crouch down on all fours, bend low and drink as does a cow?’ And so he does this. In the same way, one who is impure in both word and deed but who can attain mental clarity and calm from time to time, his words and deeds ought to be disregarded. Think only of his clarity and calm.
“And what of one whose ways are impure and who cannot even attain mental clarity and calm? Suppose a sick and ailing man, grievously ill, were going along a highway with no village in front or behind, unable to get proper food, medicine or attention, or a guide to the next village. If another man were to see him, he might feel pity and he might say to himself: ‘This poor man, he should get help or he will suffer to his destruction. ‘ In the same way, for one whose ways are impure and who cannot even attain mental clarity and calm, pity, compassion and commiseration ought to arise and you should think: ‘This poor man, he should give up the bad and develop the good, or else after death he will have a bad rebirth.’
“And concerning one whose words and deeds are pure and who has mental clarity and calm, how should malice be put away? Suppose a man, tortured by heat, by heat overspent, wearied, craving and thirsty were to come upon a pool of sweet, cool, limpid water, a lovely resting place shaded by all kinds of trees. He would plunge into the pond, bathe, drink and come out and lie there in the shade. In the same way, of this person, think about his purity and mental clarity and calm.”
Anguttara Nikaya III.185
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It happened again: I was caught in the state of acquisitiveness and almost didn’t realize it until it was too late. At present we are contemplating buying the assets of a former competitor and are taking a closer look at our financials in order to determine the best course forward. Throughout this process I have been silently comparing myself to my partner’s financial position as well as that of others around me, secretly feeling sorry for myself and turning my future prospects over and over in my head. This, along with the fact that most of the people I speak to on a daily basis are themselves subject to the right worldly concerns, means that I am lucky not to have fallen any further down the rabbit hole.
What do I need? What can I get that’s worth holding onto? Can I change my financial status not without doing irreparable harm to my relationships with friends and family? When I see things in the light of the Dhamma or is all so clear but when I forget myself I become a slave to gain.
May we develop mudita for the good fortune of others, contentedness with what we have and put our resources to use in the pursuit of spiritual growth.
One of the most confounding things about samsara is the fact that things can change so quickly and completely. Truly, if one does not live in heedfulness, guarding one’s mindfulness and returning to the theme it is very likely that they will find themselves completely lost and confused, pursuing short term gain and pleasure.
This is the situation I find myself in today. I have gone from being painfully aware of the precarious nature of existence to complacency almost overnight. And what roused me to act only days ago more finds nowhere to alight. What’s to be done? I’m not sure but allowing the mind to wallow in this state surely won’t do.
114. I have heard this said: “Sublime is abiding in love” and the Lord is proof of this because he is seen to abide in love.
Majjhima Nikaya I.369
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The pendulum swings back and forth and today I find the mind yet stepped in visions of catastrophe. And even though this is the case I have been surprised to find little pearls of joy scattered throughout which seem to grow in the failure ground of gratitude. Gratitude for friendship, kindness, the sunshine, a gentle rain. I’m not to fond of waxing poetic but it is true that the simple act of appreciation seems to lighten the load and serves as a reminder that there is more to life than darkness and negativity.
110. One may not be skilled in the habit of other’s thoughts but at least one can make this resolve: “I will be skilled in the habit of my own thoughts.” This is how you should train yourself, and this is how it is done. A woman, a man or a youth fond of self-adornment, examining his reflection in a bright, clear mirror or a bowl of clear water might see a blemish or pimple and try to remove it. And when he no longer sees it there, he is pleased and satisfied and thinks: “It is an advantage to be clean.”
In the same way, one’s introspection is most fruitful in good states when one thinks: “Am I usually greedy or hateful, overcome by sloth and torpor, with excited mind or filled with doubt or anger, or am I not? Do I usually live with soiled thoughts, or clean thoughts? With body passionate or not, sluggish or full of energy, uncontrolled or well controlled?”
If on self-examination one finds that he does live with these evil unprofitable states, then he must put forth extra desire, effort, endeavour, exertion, energy, awareness and attention to abandon them.
And if on self-examination he finds that he does not live with the evil unprofitable states, he should make an effort to establish those profitable states and further destroy the defilements.
Anguttara Nikaya V.91
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Cattāri Brahmavihārā 