Last night and, in fact, most of yesterday I found myself at the lowest point I have been at in some time. I cannot be completely certain but I believe much of it may have had a physiological cause because my mood brightened considerably and my energy level shot up as soon as I had broken fast. Why, then, do I insist on going forward with this fast especially when my observance is always incomplete (i.e., it’s missing the key component of salat)? I’m honestly not too sure how to answer that but I believe it has something to do with wanting to finish what I have started and not to let my moods and whims determine my course. And yet I will be gla d when Ramadhan ends.
For now I suppose I need to make peace with the situation and realize that, having made certain decisions in my past there is now no easy, feel-good way out. This is, I believe, what they call kamma.
Cattāri Brahmavihārā 
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