Yesterday was spent almost entirely in the long drive from NYC to Western NY and, sadly, most of it was made amidst a blaze of fury and anger the likes of which I have not seen for some time. Due to a series of unfortunate occurrences my wife and I were not at our best as we awoke yesterday and sought to prepare ourselves and the kids for the six hour trip. So, what began as snappiness and irritation snowballed into a full scale verbal assault.
I won’t go into details because I’m firmly convinced that they don’t matter. What does matter to me is that I was seemingly uunable to put the brakes on or to keep my mouth shut. I have never thought of myself as vengeful but as I felt the sting of the words being hurled at me yesterday my first impulse was to strike back–to make the person hurting me hurt as well. Obviously this is not in line with the Dhamma but I remember clearly even now how helpless I felt against it and how there seemed to be no shelter from the storm. It seems to me that once we allow ourselves to take that first step towards aggression and irritation it becomes incredibly hard to turn back so I will work there. May we look after ourselves with ease and with our own true happiness in mind.
Cattāri Brahmavihārā 
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