Cattāri Brahmavihārā

Family is a funny thing.  There’s nothing novel about the thought that family ties can feel like a noose as much as a safety belt. I write in the midst of a family crisis where someone is doing damage to everyone around them and I feel obliged to step in. Interestingly, and certainly disturbingly, the force of past conditioning (call it kamma) makes it very easy for me to react negatively and that is precisely what I’ve been doing.

Because I feel the need to protect the more vulnerable parties involved I find myself slipping into a completely negative perception of the person in question. Of course, this perception is nothing more than a caricature and as insubstantial as pond scum but you would think I had never heard a word of the Dhamma from the way that I’ve been acting and speaking about the situation.

So, what do you do when your own flesh and blood puts the safety and security of your family at risk? For my part, I know that I have not handled it as well as I would have liked but at least there is the realization of this fact. Seeing this I hope to put the brakes on my aversion and act from a place of love and compassion for the afflicted, doing what is in my power to protect them and cultivating upekkha for the perpetrator.